Damo Suzuki & Friends - Ruby Lounge 12th March 2009

So then, the Ruby Lounge.

I love the Ruby Lounge. Y'know, except for the fairly crappy view (nice touch sticking a pillar in front of the stage) and the London-priced beer. And the Toilet guy.

Maybe it is just me but I cannot wee while his eyes bore into my back. And it gets worse when I want to wash my hands and he turns on the tap for me and sprays me with some nasty smelling aftershave. Stop it. STOP IT! Also, some blokes get a lollipop from him. Why is this? Do they only get given to to the blokes who's cock the toilet guy really likes? He never gives me a lollipop. :-( What's wrong with my cock, Toilet Guy?

Toilet guy it is YOUR FAULT that I sometimes have piss on my hands after I go to the Ruby Lounge because I am avoiding you and your knock- off CK aftershave. I hope you can live with yourself.

(Actually, he wasn't working the night of the Damo Suzuki gig. I used some artistic license to pretend he was, because I've seen him at every other gig I've been to at the Ruby Lounge. Don't judge me. You don’t have any friends or a girlfriend or have ever kissed a girl or talked to a girl, so stop looking at me like that. Cheers).

By the way, I saw some music. Kraut rock legend Damo Suzuki uses a different set of local musicians wherever he plays, which can make for some very interesting improvisational results. Tonight we got three songs in an hour and 45 minutes. Fantastic stuff. Although the bloke on the clarinet really did need to calm down a bit. There was no need for the constant jazz wailing he produced. Same for the big bass saxophone he produced. Play it low for a while. Go on. It doesn't all need to be so high pitched.

If this was a real music review blog, I'd probably tell you the names of the musicians and what bands they'd been in and how good the Gibson sunburst bass was. But then you should remember I've just recently written about how you have no friends or have ever kissed a girl, so maybe you could get this info from somewhere else. If you find out, let me know. Sweet.

Pete